Lions led by Sheep -

If so, how do you choose what to fight for? 

I went shopping to the supermarket Asda today. I had a list so I wouldn’t forget anything:

• 1 H&K 9mm submachine gun - to deal with a noisy neighbour 
• 10 grams of cocaine - to relieve the stress caused by said noisy neighbour
• 2 Thai hookers - well, a man has his needs
• And a bottle of water - thirsty work all that killing, flying, and whoring!

Would you believe it, the only thing they had was bottled water!

It seems the government, in its omniscience, has decided that good people shouldn’t be allowed automatic weapons, recreational drugs, or prostitutes!

Well, excuse me, but what about my FREEDOMS!? Continue Reading »

No, it isn’t a clip of Gandhi. Nor of King’s ‘I have a dream’ speech.

No, it doesn’t tell the story of Mother Theresa. Nor of Florence Nightingale.

No, it’s not a re-enactment of part of Christ’s life. Nor an episode from Buddha’s.

And yet it’s possibly one of the most touching and inspiring things you’ll ever see.

Continue Reading »

What creature is greatest killer to ever live? Which is responsible for the most deaths and haunts the most nightmares? What monster should we most fear?

Spiders give us the creeps.

Rats repulse us.

But when it comes to your worst nightmare, there’s no competition - something lurking in the shadows. Especially if it might eat you alive.

Thanks to ‘Jaws’, one creature above all others haunts that nightmare: the Great White Shark. And what a monster it is -

• 2000lb (900kg) 
• 20 feet long (6m) 
• 70 razor-sharp teeth

The ultimate mindless, monstrous killing machine. And it’s waiting in the watery shadows just for you!

Not that it’s the only man-eater - Tiger Sharks and Bull Sharks have killed more Americans in the last 30 years than even the mighty Great White.

So to risk being eaten by these monsters… well, you’d have to be absolutely crazy!

One name: Continue Reading »

I’ve asked if animals have souls before, so why should I now think I have an answer?

Writing this post has been a tremendous struggle - I hated every second of it.

• It’s not the post I started to write.
• It’s not the post I ever dreamed I’d write.
• And it’s certainly not the post I ever wanted to write.

So why write it?

To finish a story I started last week.

So if that and the title aren’t big enough clues, I have some bad news - Sarah, the crow we rescued, is dead.

Ania and I are absolutely devastated. We looked after her for only three full days but in that time -

• we saw her character.
• we saw her developing - learning how to drink, to eat.
• we saw her loving life.

We’d have loved to keep her, but knew that was being totally selfish and that her best chance of survival and of living a full life as a wild bird was for us to give her up and take her to a bird sanctuary.

This we did.

Their specialist told us she was healthy and had a good chance of being released.

Just hours later, she was dead.

So what happened that a healthy crow suddenly died?

Continue Reading »

Global warming is set to be the villain of the 21st century. Unless oil prices bankrupt us all, so we can’t run anything to create the pollution. But is there an upside?

Sunday, June 1st, Ania and I spent eight hours online searching for a sightseeing-packed summer holiday. Finally, we plumped on the U.S..

We found the cheapest flight, cheapest car hire, and plotted a route to include such wonders as the Grand Canyon, Yosemite and Yellowstone. Over the next week, we verified a few facts, then Saturday, went online to book everything.

Within seconds we were as miserable as sin. And one of us was swearing profusely. (I’ll let you guess which.)

The flight we needed had rocketed by £160 ($320). We were already over budget, so that bust everything.

We returned to scouring the web, vainly hoping a cheap flight would miraculously appear.

But miracles just don’t happen, do they?

Continue Reading »

Is there anything more wonderful than inter-species love?

Man/woman love is so overrated (as is obvious from the 50% divorce rate).

But before anyone scampers to their local park to pork a poodle, ask yourself one question - are you truly ready for everything inter-species love entails?

If so, read on.If not, skip upsetting yourself, dash to the comments section, and register your outrage.

But whatever you do… don’t continue reading.

Really. Don’t.

DON’T! Continue Reading »

If they do, so many of them must be crying for all eternity after how we treated them!

• A special effects creation from the latest Hollywood monster movie?
• A newly discovered species from the depths of the Amazon jungle?
• An alien hoax?

No.
This is ‘Dany the dog’.
Yes, dog!
As in ‘man’s best friend’. As in a ‘licking your face, jumping for joy when it sees you’ dog. This ‘thing’ could be bringing you your morning paper or chasing your Frisbee in the park. Unfortunately, as Dany learned all too well, Bangkok’s streets are not overflowing with Frisbees, beaming smiles, or loving pats… just pain, suffering, and anguish. Continue Reading »